Breaking Right! America’s #1 Source of Newstainment, GWU! polled our readership of liberty-loving lads to crank out our ultimate list of the most right-on-target babes of the Beltway. Our red-blooded readers tell us these FOX-y ladies are just as hot on the inside as they are on the outside—serving up a double dose of beauty and Breitbart-brained brilliance.
7. No Shooting Blanks with this War Room Bombshell, Natalie Winters
Co-hosting with Steve Bannon at just age 23 and making older men stand at erection, Winters warms our readers’ hearts. The podcast secret weapon blasted through the University of Chicago in just three years, probably because she couldn’t wait to get her hands on something more stimulating. Raised in Santa Monica but born to fight for freedom, this populist nationalist refuses to wear conventional pantsuits, leaving plenty to the imagination… and our poll confirms, GWU! like it that way. Whether she’s grilling White House press secretaries or dousing your patience with her massive milk jugs, Natalie Winters is one fresh face our readers would happily be interrogated by any night of the week.
6. You’ll Crepe Your Pants over Chanel Rion
This is the Chanel you can’t afford—but a man can dream. The former OAN chief White House correspondent, cartoonist, and children’s book author knows how to draw a crowd. Born in Houston, raised across three continents, and fluent in French, she’s got global experience and local curves. She left the country as a kid because her family disapproved of Bill Clinton (for realz—ed) — foreshadowing her lifelong commitment to saying no to slick Democrats. Now married to Courtland Sykes with a son named Atlas, Chanel Rion still finds time to carry water for Rudy Giuliani (is that guy still around—ed). With a grandmother who was a psychic, both she and GWU! readers are certain of a beautiful future.
5. Extra Sauce on this Delicious Meatball, Emily Compagno
Motle Bella is what happens when the cold, hard law meets the warm, soft rear-end zone. This Italian-American beauty has her law degree, and to boot, is a former NFL cheerleader for the Oakland Raiders. Currently a Fox News co-host, Emily Compagno knows how to pump up a crowd and raise the flag. While working in criminal defense and simultaneously as a cheerleader, she still found time to visit troops overseas as a USO tour ambassador. Now that’s taking one for the team! In other words, she’s got brains, brawn, and a classically beautiful Italian body that won’t quit. When she’s not solving crimes on her true crime podcast (the libtard did it with a dildo in the Arts & Crafts room—ed), she’s solving the mystery of why dem men can’t handle a woman who’s both brilliant and built. Spoiler: they can’t. But based on our poll, GWU! can!
4. No Dykes on this Dutch Treat, Eva Vlaardingerbroek
Meet the Dutch destroyer of leftist soy boys—a legal philosopher who graduated cum laude (is that a pun?—ed) and still finds time to make mass migration advocates lose their composure. Born in Amsterdam, this delectable lil’ Dutch maid traded bicycles for battle cries, becoming an international sensation during the farmers’ protests and draconian COVID lockdowns. She’s a devout Catholic who converted in 2023, married an Italian lawyer in Rome, and popped out a son—all while making Tucker Carlson cry blue balls. Eva Vlaardingerbroek believes in national sovereignty, traditional values, and the kind of curves that make the EU pass emergency measures. She’s proof that the Netherlands exports more than just tulips and stroopwafels. It also exports trouble—the sexy kind.
3. Not Just Your Sexy Weather Girl, Casey Riley, GWU! Tonight!
Speaking with no fear and no favor from the GWU! Broadcast Studios in sunny Miami, Florida, Casey Riley brings viewers the newstainment they need to know. Born to a French-Canadian tabloid gossip reporter and a Burmese male model in the 51st State, Riley has the genetics that make her look great in the newsroom and in a pair of jeans. A journalism graduate of Ryerson University (before the communist Toronto government renamed it after corporate sponsor Temu—ed), Riley was a standout, if short-lived, teen reporter on the CBC youth consumer news program Street Cents. Network executives reportedly dismissed her over an undercover investigation exposing how much air is inside a bag of chips after the powerful PEI potato chip lobby pressured the public broadcaster. Unfazed by the career setback, Riley worked largely behind the scenes in Canadian alt-media for a number of years. Later moving to GWU! News at the start of the so-called pandemic, Riley followed the publication’s move to the US after filing for political refugee status.
This eligible bachelorette who enjoys collecting comic books and attending Grateful Dead tribute band shows has been linked to famous YouTuber IShowSpeed and actor Tom Holland. While she insists that she’s not ready to settle down and has publicly dispelled rumors that there is any hanky-panky going on in the newsroom with her simping co-host Media Monkey GWU! readers suspect otherwise.
2. I did it MILF Way, Megyn Kelly
Megyn Kelly used to be the woman who made Donald Trump sweat. Now she makes him proud. After breaking free from the corpse of NBC, Megyn reinvented herself as YouTube’s hottest Trump-defending mama bear. Her Megyn Kelly Show reaches millions, where she tears into Democrats with the kind of ferocity that suggests she’s still got something to prove—and a lot to offer. She’s a former corporate lawyer, a mother of three, and the owner of a smirk that says “I told you so” that’s better than any headline. Megyn went from clashing with Trump in 2015 to now supporting the Prez. That’s not a flip-flop. That’s a long, slow ride to the right side of history.
1. Leavitt to this Babe’s Busy Beaver, Karoline Leavitt
Karoline Leavitt is the youngest White House press secretary in history—and the easiest on the eyes since … well, ever. At just 28, this former softball player is no switch hitter. She knows how to rir⅙de the bases, slide into home, and leave reporters striking out. She’s married to a multimillionaire real estate mogul with whom she has two children, but that doesn’t stop her from stepping up to the podium in heels that could kill. Karoline briefs the press with a twinkling smile that says “try me” and a drop-dead figure that says “don’t.” She’s opened the White House briefing room to podcasters and influencers because she knows the legacy media is flaccid and she prefers something with a little more pulse. Watch out, D.C.—Leavitt leaves no question unanswered, and according to GWU! readers, no man unsatisfied.
