Monkey Business

What to Bring to a Millennial Pity Party

Millennials, once considered a special generation, now face adulthood's harsh reality. Their "you can do anything" upbringing has led to a crisis. Characterized by underemployment, being over-medicated, and a permanent housing crisis, they are stuck in endless adult "side quests" without a clear path to success, leaving the generation in significant trouble.

Jimmy Kimmel Dies Suddenly 

The sudden cancellation of Jimmy Kimmel Live! comes after the humorless hosts controversial on-air remarks about the recent murder of conservative activist Charlie Kirk triggered a massive backlash. The move is being celebrated by many who view it as cancel culture finally coming full circle, as one of late-night's biggest names is silenced in the latest must-see TV controversy.

How ‘Financing a Burrito’ Is Bankrupting GenZ 

While the phrase "finance a burrito" is typically a joke, the concept of paying for small purchases in installments or "Buy Now, Pay Later" (BNPL) has become wildly popular, especially among the terminally online and always broke GenZ set.

7 First Ladies Who Are Actually Men—GWU! Transvestigation Exclusive

The evil gender inversion of political transwives is all part of a larger plan to pervert humanity while enriching the global elite and bankrupting morality as outlined by GWU! gossip columnist to the stars, Clammy J. Byner.

Confessions of a Crypto Rug Puller: $TRUMP Coin Exposed!!!

Posing as the son of a Nigerian Prince, it wasn’t hard for me to infiltrate the crypto community, says Johnny Jock, who went deep undercover into the dark and ruthless world of crypto shit coins.

American Catholics Confess: New Pope Can Go to Hell!!!

MAGA Catholics breathing smoke as Chicago-born Pope embraces globalism, open borders & leftist agendas—betraying Trump’s America First doctrine. Everyday faithful vow to defend tradition against Vatican’s woke revolt.

Quiz: Are You Living in a Fascist State?

Amid political turmoil and social instability, many Americans are wondering if the true state of the nation is actually a fascist state. Take the GWU! Quiz to find out where you stand!!!

Marc Maron Is Actually Pretty Funny… After All the TDS Drivel: Says Boomer

During a trip to Vermont, Toby P. Gelman finds himself at a Marc Maron comedy show, only to find they have more in common than they think.

American Families Rescuing Victims of Canada’s Radical Leftist Agenda

Canadians flee Trudeau’s woke dystopia as Carney’s regime imposes censorship, crippling taxes, and DEI madness. Heroic red-state families offer refuge—deprogramming refugees with BBQ, freedom, and the Second Amendment.

California Liberals Spend to Smash Cybertrucks in So-Called ‘Safe Space’

Berkeley’s wokest ‘rage room’ charges liberals $50 to smash Trump effigies—because nothing cures TDS like a sledgehammer and a Cybertruck part. GWU! investigates the lucrative business of monetizing liberal meltdowns.

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