That's Bananas!

Tesla Derangement Syndrome Cases Surge

"Leftwing activists vandalize Teslas in misguided rage over Elon Musk’s Trump ties. Experts call it 'emotional reasoning gone wild,' undermining eco-conscious goals. Tesla backlash: self-sabotage or insanity?"

Newly Installed PM Mark Carney Orders Canadians to Attack “Elbows Up!”

So-called Prime Minister Mark Carney’s “Elbows Up!” war cry has Canadians channeling their inner Gordie Howe, while Americans are all like “Who the hell is Gordie Howe?” Plus Mike Myers elbows his way back into late-night "comedy."

Love Is Blind Gals Say “I Do” to Woke Mind Virus

Sara and Ben’s Love Is Blind romance crumbled over woke ideology, while Devin was left at the altar when Virginia fled over his family’s Trump support. Is love now a political battleground?

AOC’s “MAGA Maid” Dishes About Dem’s Dramatic Weight Gain

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s shocking weight gain revealed – her Trump-loving maid tells all about congresswoman’s feast of fat!

Disastrous new Captain America movie saves lives, thanks to empty theater

Captain America: Brave New World’s screening caused a ceiling collapse at Liberty Cinema, saving lives by being so boring only two attended.

Trudeau Calls Canadian Expats to Arms in Trade War Against America

Thousands of Canadian expats abandon U.S. homes, boycott American goods, and vow to stand with Trudeau in escalating trade battle—despite economists warning of dire consequences for Canada's economy.

Brewing Tariff Bitterness Spills into Canadian Cafes 

In a lame and predictable move that has captured the attention of coffee loving Canadian ‘patriot’ bandwagon jumpers, cafes in the northern socialist country...

Let’s Play Oscar BINGO!

Chaos reigns as Anora and The Brutalist vie for glory. Will Timothée Chalamet triumph? Play GWU! Oscar Bingo for cringe speeches and wild surprises!

Women Lying About Vaccine Status to Win Over Based Bros.

Sandra & Debbie, vaccinated and single, lie about their vax status to date anti-vax men. Women like them are boosting dating sites like Unjected, with serious side effects!!!

Doctor Who Battles Cancellation as Villainous ‘Agenda’ Alienates Fans 

Doctor Who faces cancellation as woke storylines alienate fans, causing ratings to plummet. Critics blame gender politics, preachy tone, and poor leadership for the show’s decline. 

Sign up and get GWU!'s Breaking the Narrative and Weird Week in Woke Digest sent to your inbox.